October 25, 2022

My first book, What I Mean When I Say I’m Autistic, is now available in paperback, hardcover, and every kind of ebook!

For autistics everywhere, this is a book to help you understand your brain more deeply, with words you can borrow to describe who you truly are.

For non-autistics, it’s a book to …

November 4, 2023

I’ve been thinking a lot about what makes a person feel safe to me, and what a new person could say that might immediately free me to unmask. For example:

“There is no wrong way to move.”

“I won’t think any less of you for liking something I dislike, or for disliking something I do …

October 28, 2023

Many writers, myself included, face both the expectation and the opportunity to become more than a writer.

I could be on a podcast, give a speech, go on a book tour, do radio interviews, make videos – and if I do all that, I might even end up on TV!

But I’ve been …

October 27, 2023

You may have heard of intermittent speech, where a person can speak at some times and not others. But have you heard of insufficient speech?

The term was new to me until I found a paper about the benefits of AAC – including low-tech AAC like writing or sign language – for autistic adults who …

October 21, 2023

My spiky functioning affects how I handle recurring tasks such as housework. If I don’t space out those tasks, then several might become urgent on the same day – perhaps a day when I don’t have much capacity.

I can’t control the influx of random new tasks, but I can steady the stream of recurring …

September 29, 2023

Continuing my quest for precise and accurate language, I want to talk about the term “high functioning” – and why I’m not a fan of the most common alternative, “low support needs.”

“High functioning” is imprecise, because it can mean:

1. Support needs are lower. In this case, “low support needs” would be accurate – …

September 25, 2023

If you’re “twice exceptional” (gifted and disabled) and kids tease you at school, adults might say it’s because the kids are jealous.

I believe that’s hardly ever true. Here’s what I think is happening instead.

Outside school, where stress is likely lower, your gifts stand out more than your struggles. But inside school, or on …

September 24, 2023

I want to bust a myth about brains. All brains, not just autistic brains – but I don’t think you can fully understand autism without understanding this first.

Most people think that a brain works like a computer: First you get input from your senses, then you process it, then you act on it.

But …

September 23, 2023

I reject the narrative that a child is “not being herself” when she’s moody.

Because if so, who is she being? If she has become someone else, then where did her true self go?

Nowhere. She’s right there, hearing those words – and possibly taking them literally.

Wondering why people treat her like a changeling. …

September 20, 2023

Rushing to make decisions can be a form of masking.

If I’m afraid I’ll make someone impatient, I wouldn’t necessarily call that masking. But it’s masking if the thing that I fear is how I’ll be seen as a person.

My stereotype of an intelligent person is not slow. So I wear the mask of …

September 16, 2023

Trying to stop an emotion – in yourself or someone you love – is like trying to stop a wave.

I speak from experience as someone who has tried to stop a wave, for fun, just to see what would happen.

You dig your toes into the shifting sand, eyeing the rising crest, bracing for …