January 17, 2021

These days, it seems like nearly everyone objects to the fairytale trope of a damsel in distress. “I’d rather rescue myself,” one singer says, with many echoing the sentiment.

I do rescue, protect, and provide for myself. But it’s no adventure.

For me, adventure happens in the moments when I can find help, when I …

January 14, 2021

Twenty years ago, in the dead of winter, I was a miserable middle schooler – anxious, friendless, and too smart for my own good.

My parents pulled me out of school for a week, and took me somewhere new. I’m pretty sure that week single-handedly saved my mental health.

We drove and drove, crossing state …

January 11, 2021

I can do many things – some of the time. When I can’t, it’s hard to convince people who’ve seen me do it before.

Moreover, it’s hard to convince myself.

I push myself too hard when I assume that my current self is the same as my recent self. It’s not – my abilities fluctuate …

January 10, 2021

The Internet has thousands of ideas to help autistic people thrive – also known as coping strategies, accommodations, or life hacks.

If I see a good idea but then keep scrolling, I usually forget to try it. If I make a list of every good idea I see, then I get overwhelmed and ignore the …

January 10, 2021

Autism is internal.

Does it have external effects? Sure – in how I move, speak, react, and position my body. But if you took away all of that, my mind would still be autistic.

Still gathering details before drawing conclusions.

Still noticing patterns in diverse data.

Still processing some info under a speed limit.

Still …

January 9, 2021

Here’s what I know about “selective mutism” – the ability to speak at some times but not others. This is based on limited personal experience (a few times a year), plus what I’ve learned from others.

Many advocates with selective mutism seem to dislike the name. It makes it sound like a choice – something …

January 4, 2021

Autistic children who have meltdowns don’t grow out of them. Some do stop having them, though.

What’s the difference?

You “grow out of” something when your brain or body changes. Although all brains mature over time, autistics thankfully maintain the capacity for meltdowns, as a safety valve when the pressure gets too high.

If meltdowns …

December 23, 2020

Early one December, when I was a preteen, my parents asked what I wanted for Christmas. I said that I didn’t really care about the specifics, but liked the idea of lots and lots of gifts under the tree – overflowing piles, filling every inch from the floor to the lower branches.

You can probably …

December 23, 2020

Years ago, before I knew I was autistic, I spent eight months living in a highly neurodiverse house. Most of my housemates had ADHD, PTSD, bipolar, autism, or some combination of those. I might have been the only one who didn’t realize I was neurodivergent.

In that house, I didn’t feel like an introvert. I …

December 22, 2020

“It doesn’t have to be a snowman…”

In this poignant moment, Princess Anna reveals that her many invitations to build a snowman were nothing more than a bid for connection.

Her sister Elsa still refuses, afraid that her dangerous, beautiful, icy, uncontainable powers will hurt Anna – again.

I’m beginning to realize that my social …