June 16, 2018

Someone asked me what I like most about myself.

It took me awhile to answer, because the things that came to mind first weren’t things I observe about myself, which I assume was the intent of the question.

Rather, taking it literally, I started thinking of things I enjoy experiencing about myself from the inside – things that I like about being me.

I like the way I hear music, as something infinitely complex and interesting, so much that favorite old songs sound new every time.

I like the way my thoughts analyze patterns and identify structures that bring order out of chaos.

I like the way I notice every beautiful little thing in my environment.

I like the way textures feel on my skin, so calming and exhilarating at the same time. Especially tree bark… and most especially, if I get to experience it while clambering up to a secret space, one that only I can reach, all dappled in green and gold, sheltered from what overwhelms me, surrounded by what delights me.

“I’m good at climbing,” I said.

It was close enough.

P.S. I write from my personal experience as an autistic. What I share is not a substitute for advice from an autistic medical professional. Also, some of my opinions have changed since I first wrote them.